Obsessive thinking can be a lonely struggle, but it is something most people experience at some point in their lives. Perhaps you have experienced a trauma, a loss, or a breakup that you can’t stop thinking about. Maybe you find yourself worrying over and over about the same possible events that could happen in the future. Or it could be that you can’t stop replaying something you said or did in your head.
Sometimes obsessive thinking can center on something exciting or fun, like getting to know a new romantic interest or anticipating a vacation. Even when the content of your obsessive thoughts is positive, it can be exhausting for the same thoughts to play out over and over in your mind. Whatever the case, if you’re having difficulty managing your obsessive thoughts, you may feel like you have no control over what’s happening in your own head.
Here are some tips you can use to help manage your obsessive thoughts and give your mind a break.
Find an “oasis activity”
One great way to ease your obsessive thinking is to find something that absorbs your attention completely. For some people, this could be playing a high-intensity sport, but for others it could be playing video games or knitting. Whatever it is for you, it should be an activity that takes up so much of your attention that it provides a kind of temporary “oasis” from your usual thoughts.
Obsessive thinking patterns tend to be circular in nature and an “oasis activity” can help to break up these cyclical thoughts. By shifting your focus to something else, you can often manage your obsessive thoughts and give your mind a break. Sometimes people turn to substances in order to accomplish this, but oasis activities provide a healthier alternative to substances with a similarly relieving effect.
Make “appointments” with the thoughts
Obsessive thoughts are often uncomfortable, but there can be some value in exploring them. Furthermore, avoiding these thoughts tends to just make them more persistent and intrusive. One way to manage intrusive thoughts without completely avoiding them is to schedule “appointments” with them. Set aside a specific time to let yourself get absorbed in the thoughts and their accompanying feelings in a safe and comfortable place. You may want to stimulate the thoughts by journaling or talking them out to yourself or a trusted friend. You can even set a timer for a specific amount of time (20 minutes, for example) to give into the obsessive thoughts and explore them with curiosity.
This can also help you to manage your obsessive thoughts outside of the appointed time. If you find yourself focusing on the obsessive thoughts, remind yourself that you have an appointment with yourself to think about them. Remembering this may help you to put them out of your mind until that time.
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Use a CBT app
Many times, obsessive thinking occurs over and over as the same thoughts. Finding a way to shift those thoughts can help relieve you of their persistent nature. A useful tool to assist you in this shift is a cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) app, like CBT Thought Diary. This app can help you to identify the thoughts you are obsessing over, externalize the thought by writing it down, and then to assess the thought. The app can help you to see if you are falling into any problematic patterns of thinking, such as catastrophizing, self-blaming, mind-reading, or all-or-nothing thinking. The app will then help you to challenge your obsessive thought and replace it with a more helpful thought. Overall, this sequence can help you to shift your obsessive thinking patterns and find relief from thinking the same thoughts over and over.
Shift your awareness to your body
Obsessive thinking can really make you feel like you are stuck in your head. In moments like this, your body can be a great tool for getting out of your thoughts, even temporarily. Sit or lay down quietly and see if you can shift your awareness into your body. Search for physical sensations such as tension, pain, tingling, heaviness, and warmth. Investigate with curiosity the current state of different parts of your body. If you need some help, you can try listening to a body scan guided meditation, which will guide you through the process.
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Obsessive thoughts, whether positive or negative, can be exhausting. These tips are meant to give your mind a break and to shift the thoughts in new directions. Distracting yourself and shifting your awareness away from these thoughts are good ways to ease your obsessive thinking. However, it can also be useful to get curious and give some space to the thoughts in different and intentional ways.
What techniques do you use to manage your obsessive thoughts? Leave your answer in the comments below.
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2 comments
Great blog, Weston! Obsessive thoughts can be exhausting and anxiety provoking. Thanks for offering these great suggestions on managing this. I really appreciate the suggestion of making an appointments with the thoughts. As it can be challenging when attempting to stop the thoughts. But, knowing that you have an appointment to sit with your thoughts makes the idea of stopping the thoughts less daunting. Personally, I tend to use the oasis approach. This is so helpful, thanks!
Amazing blog Weston! I really like your point about making appointments with your thoughts. I think giving space for our thoughts and feelings to exist is really important.