As the holiday season approaches, it can evoke a mix of joy, nostalgia, anticipation, and financial and emotional stress. The holidays can be extremely emotionally driven. We can all relate on wanting to recreate the magical vibes we might have felt as children at the holidays. Perhaps we want to build different, more meaningful holiday memories in adulthood if we feel that was missing in childhood. Regardless, it can be easy to get caught up chasing magic at the expense of our authenticity and bank account.
This blog post explores what the holidays mean to each of us and what really matters most in the season. We will explore creating an intentional holiday budget with our money and our time. Then, we will consider simple, new, budget-friendly ways that keep the spirit of the holidays alive. Finally, we will also discuss how to manage stress and cultivate gratitude during a season designed to support consumerism over connection.
What Do the Holidays Mean to You?
It can be so easy to get caught up in the bigger, sparklier, moreishness of the holiday season. Long tables set with coordinating bowls of endless traditional holiday foods, extra-large bags overflowing with impeccably wrapped gift boxes, or cascades of holly, ribbon, and twinkling lights might easily come to mind when you think about planning for holiday events. After all, nothing says Thanksgiving like a literal overflowing horn of plenty! Unfortunately, decking the halls can lead to a total knock out when it comes to holiday budgeting.
First, take a moment to consider what makes the holiday season feel important to you. As you reflect on past holidays, what meaning do you make of your most precious memories? If your goal is to create happy holiday memories for the first time, what are the exact feelings you want to evoke? Maybe you value your grandmother’s holiday cookies because the flavor is nostalgic, and baking together felt like a special event for just you two. Perhaps a room full of twinkling lights or the scent of fresh evergreen trees feels so delightful because it makes you feel a mix of anticipation and coziness. Maybe watching a loved one smile when they open the perfect gift fills you with warmth and satisfaction.
These examples are not just about the perfect cookies, decor, and gifts. They are also very much about simple pleasures, togetherness, traditions, safety, and caring for those we love. Identifying the meaning behind your holiday goals can help create a special holiday experience while protecting your holiday budget.
Build a Holiday Budget
Next, think about how much money you plan to spend throughout your holiday season. Financial experts have suggested that 1% of your annual income can be one way to determine a responsible amount for a holiday budget. Reviewing how much you spent in past years is another way to come up with a baseline figure. The amount you choose is a personal decision based on your values and goals. The important point is to plan ahead to achieve your goals within that number.
Once you have your target number, consider dividing your budget into categories ranked by importance or need. For example, if you have a small number of people on your gift list, maybe the decoration and food costs for your annual holiday party can take up a larger portion of your budget. You might also need to remember travel expenses, including gas and accommodations, tips for apartment building super or doorman, and miscellaneous items such as cards, postage, and hostess gifts. These small, sneaky expenses can really add up, so aim to be as detailed as possible when you create your holiday budget.
Get Creative With Your Money and Time
Now that you have a budget for holiday spending and where the money will go, it’s time to get creative. If you’re struggling to find the “perfect” gift for someone special, recall how you want the holidays to feel and what meaning and feeling you really want your gifts to convey. Time is money – as the old adage goes – and sometimes simply carving out time in this modern, fast-paced world to be connected to the ones we love can be more valuable than any gift money can buy.
Consider being discerning with your time as well as your finances. Perhaps you cannot RSVP a resounding YES to every fete because host gifts, travel, or babysitting expenses can add up, easily busting your holiday budget. Decide which events are the most important for you to attend, and send regrets for those that can be skipped. If you’ve counted comfort and simple pleasures among your reasons for the season, maybe this extra downtime can be spent at home with a friend and your favorite holiday movie. This is just one way to honor your holiday goals, and for less than the cost of the cab fare to another party.
Let your most important holiday goals inspire new traditions to protect your finances. If you’re a host at heart, consider a new theme for your holiday event. Maybe you pivot to a potluck this year and suggest guests bring only appetizers or desserts. The money you save on a full-course meal can be spent on extra decorations. The time you save cooking and cleaning can be spent making memories with your guests. And easy-to-eat foods can encourage mingling and a more relaxed vibe.
Giving the Gift of Time
Give the gift of your time to the ones you love. As expensive as New York can easily be, this city can be a treasure trove of opportunities for budget-friendly experiences that support meaning and connection. Many museums in the city offer free admission on certain days and times of the week. Make a date with your art-loving auntie at the Whitney on the second Sunday of any month for free admission. Fill two thermos bottles with hot coffee and meet your friend at a holiday market for some strolling and browsing. Offer to babysit your niece and nephews so your sister and her partner can have a date night without worrying about childcare. Joining him in his favorite video game or stringing popcorn garland together can be excellent ways to invite your tween nephew to actually talk to you about his life.
However, if physical gifts light you up the most, don’t shy away from thinking outside of the box (pun intended!). Stretch your dollars by shopping sales all year long. If you’re crafty, consider DIY wreaths or candles, personalized to perfection. Don’t overlook goodwill or thrift store finds – unique, pre-loved gems can save your finances and the planet.
Quiet the Noise and Cultivate Gratitude
Finally, let’s recall your own reasons for the season that you identified earlier in this post. When all is said and done, what do you really want your gifts, food, or presence to accomplish? Chances are good that it’s not about perfection or stuff, stuff, and more stuff. Take stock of your established traditions and decide if they still deliver what you intend. Take some time to get introspective, quiet the siren of the capitalist machine, and consider fresh perspectives as the holidays approach this year.
If you find yourself recreating traditions that no longer align with your goals simply because “that’s the way you’ve always done it”, it might be time to be grateful that they served you at one time in your life. Release them with love to make room for new traditions that honor your needs, your holiday goals, and your finances. What other ways can we reframe the demands of the holiday season? If your gift list is overwhelming, for example, can it inspire you to feel grateful that you have so many special people in your life, rather than a burdensome financial obligation? It stands to reason that those people aren’t in your inner circle just because of the things you buy for them.
If your goal is to ring in the new year having met the goals aligned with your reasons for the holiday season, try starting from a place of gratitude for what you already have. This can make it much easier to create a holiday season full of connectedness, comfort, nostalgia, and special memories without busting your holiday budget.
Do you want to explore holiday budgeting in therapy? Reach out to myTherapyNYC to find out which of our therapists would be a good fit for you!
What are your holiday budgeting tips? Join the conversation in the comments below!
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