Racism and Mental Health: Using Self-Compassion to Fight Racism

March 2020 marked such a significant time of change. The whole world plunged into a collective health crisis. At the same time, the world was also plunged into a socio-cultural crisis propelled through racism. Xenophobic violence and discrimination has always been a current issue within our society. However, the pandemic has jump started this resurgence of racism that has developed into a hungry battle for some reprieve. Speaking as a person of color, it almost seems like there is no escape to these intensive environments that are our current reality. Racism is this otherworldly, large socio-cultural and economic construct that can often feel bigger than our own individual experiences. And, furthermore, racism and mental health and intricately connected.

However, taking an active step back, I am here to tell you that your experiences do matter. If you find yourself struggling with racism and declining mental health, this experience is valid. If you have ever felt invalidated in your experiences, this invalidation is not a reflection of you. Affirming yourself with compassion and grace, especially during moments of external invalidation, is such an essential part of fighting racism with self-compassion. Self-validation and self-compassion is easier said than done. Coping with racism is difficult, but possible. This begs the following question: how can we fight racism through self-compassion?

The impact of racism on mental health

Racist rhetoric against people of color has been more present and prominent since the start of the pandemic. An example of this present racism can be seen in statements like, “Go back to your country,” or in anti-APPI rhetoric like, “Kung-flu virus” or “Chinese flu.” Racism has also been more explicit and confrontational in the past few years with many people of color facing violent discriminatory acts. In this heightened environment, racial trauma has become genuinely intense and even more difficult to cope with.

It suffices to say that this level of trauma has also had a heightened impact on mental health. This cultural climate can cause more symptoms of depression and anxiety. One can even find themselves struggling with anger, shame, guilt, grief, or a sense of helplessness. The intrusiveness of these emotions can generate more internal conflict, especially when it comes to maintaining a sense of community and belonging.

Difficulty coping

The seriousness of racial trauma and its impacts on mental health is not a one-solution-fits-all scenario. By no means is this article intended to invalidate the complexity of these experiences. Continuous exposure, conversation, and discussion may not always help a person who is struggling to cope with such a stressful environment. With this in mind, many people are finding it hard to cope with such a heightened and sensitive time in our society. There are so many pressures and stressors to daily living. Facing situational difficulties like confrontational racism can be overwhelming, especially when we see it happening every day.  The rise of racist rhetoric can generate more internal conflict with ourselves. In all hope and graciousness, I invite those who are reading this article to think about the one thing that can help validate your experiences, boost your mental wellness, and help you to cope with racism. Think of it as your secret weapon: self-compassion. 

Read more about racial trauma and its effect on mental health

What is self-compassion?

So, what is compassion? What does it mean to show yourself compassion? To be compassionate and to be self-compassionate are two different forms of care. Compassion means to feel empathy towards another’s suffering, and holding motivation to alleviate this suffering. This alleviation can be shown to anyone – friends, family, and even strangers! Compassion is also seen through acts of kindness, or by granting emotional space to those who may need it. To be self-compassionate means to feel empathy for your own suffering, and to show yourself the same kindness that you would give to others. Self-compassion is an inner strength that requires the means to be kind to yourself during unjust situations and interactions with the external world. Now that we have established what it means to be self-compassionate, how can we intentionally hold this space for ourselves? How can we build resilience in our self-compassion? 

Using self-compassion

It is important to view self-compassion as something that we all inherently have as human beings. This is a skill that you already have – acknowledging its existence is the hard part! Racism is a construct geared towards breaking down any inner strengths that you already have. It’s within being kind to yourself that we actually start to unconsciously rely on these inner strengths to cope and fight racism. In other words, the act of self-compassion is consciously allowing yourself to depend on your inner strengths.

Giving yourself warmth, understanding, and acceptance when you’re feeling suffering and pain is self-compassion. We have no control over how other people may react in these situations. The only control that we have is over how we respond. A self-compassionate response entails caring for ourselves, reflecting on these experiences, becoming more self-aware, and building resilience. Once we understand these elements about self-compassion, then we are able to continue building upon this foundation through the following concepts: 

Mindfulness

Being aware of your own awareness is easier said than done! To further clarify this, we build self-awareness by being mindful of our thoughts, feelings, physical sensations, and our surrounding environments from a self-nurturing perspective. Practicing acceptance for our current circumstances is giving respect to our thoughts and feelings without judgment! This ties into giving ourselves that warmth and care that we deserve during difficult moments in our day-to-day life.

This brings us back to our secret weapon: self-compassion. In this practice, we are able to give respect to ourselves in processing these harsh moments. We can acknowledge their presence, how they may affect you, let it be in its own present moment in time, and then let it go. Keep in mind that there is no right or wrong way to practice mindfulness, as that would defeat the purpose of mindfulness itself. You can try mindfulness at any point, or through guided meditations. Give yourself extra patience throughout this process, and as much time as you need.

Affirmations

Affirmations are short yet powerful statements that are great in combating the internalization of negative thoughts. As the connection between racism and mental health can be maladaptive and intense, utilizing affirmations gives back your own sense of control. Affirmations strengthen the boundary being placed between yourself/your identity and racist rhetoric. An example of an affirmation can look like, “I am free of other people’s judgements,” or “I am not a stereotype.” You have the freedom to be creative, and to use as many affirmations as you would like. Self-affirming enables you to utilize self-compassion through a humanizing lens. Through this, you learn to exercise more love and kindness towards yourself. 

Sense of Community

As I already mentioned, the relationship between racism and mental health can be mentally and emotionally taxing. One factor is the impact of racism on a sense of community. Remember, racism is designed and used to deconstruct your own internal and external communities. Please know that while these experiences are harrowing, they do not require you to isolate yourself. You are not alone in your suffering and pain. Reach out to your social support system: your friends, family, teachers, your therapist, or even your pet!

Others are there to help you fight racism as a collective team, whether this be through coping with racism or through taking an active stance. It’s hard to fight racism alone. Rely on others to help you in this battle. You may have more in common with them than you think. If you find yourself struggling after facing discrimination, allow yourself to let in other people who care about you. Allowing yourself to receive care and compassion from others only models that you are capable of also giving care and compassion to yourself. 

What self-compassion is not

There is no right or wrong way to show kindness to yourself. It is important to note that being self-compassionate can be a natural defense for marginalized people, especially because racism intends to defeat this kindness. Racism is an act of harm. For example, the statement that I mentioned previously, “Go back to your country!” carries a negative connotation of dehumanization. It indicates to the other person that they do not belong in their respective country, and that they are not welcome just because of their racial identity. The statement can enable the person receiving this to feel that intense level of stress, anger towards self, or heighten that “powerlessness” or “weak” feeling.

People use racist rhetoric to convince the other person that they should not be kind to themselves because they “do not deserve it.” Some of the outcomes of facing racial injustice can include negative self-talk and intrusive automatic thoughts. If this process of internalization resonates with you, know that self-compassion isn’t giving in, or surrendering to that experience. Self-compassion does not indicate weakness, nor does it enable self-pity. It does not include separating ourselves from other people, or living in blissful ignorance of other people who may be having similar experiences. Rather, self-compassion is the act of humanizing these emotions. To show yourself compassion is normalizing that all people deserve safety, care, growth, clarity, and understanding.

Self-compassion, today more than ever

Ever since the COVID-19 Pandemic onset in March 2020, so many people have suffered and witnessed others suffering. Many people have lost loved ones, and have had to feel suffering through grief. Simultaneously, our culture started to shift, especially related to racial justice movements like Black Lives Matter (#BLM), and Stop Asian Hate. More than ever, people have found themselves placed within emotional states of sadness, anger, frustration. The listed emotions are not all that encapsulate this cultural shift, but they do signify an extended and elevated level of suffering that can feel very self-defeating and irrefutable.

This is a type of suffering with significant undertones of xenophobia and racist rherotic that has been more present and prominent each day. When you are not experiencing kindness from others, it is important to give this kindness to yourself. Self-compassion is an inner strength that is within all people, and is something that we can always depend on to cope with and fight racial injustice.   If you feel that you are still unsure about how to show compassion for yourself, allow me to be the first to show you.

As an Asian-American woman living in NYC, I face racial microaggressions and anti-asian discriminatory acts frequently. To demonstrate compassion to myself, I tell myself the following affirmations during difficult times: “I am not their words or their hate. I am more than what they say that I am. I am enough.” And I affirm and recognize that this is enough.   

Struggling with the effects of racism? Reach out to myTherapyNYC to work with a trained psychotherapist who can help.

What are some other ways that you use self-compassion to fight racism? Join the conversation in the comments below!