Tips on Managing Your Gift Giving Anxiety

Gift giving anxiety

The holidays can be a wondrous and joyous time for relaxing, spending time with loved ones, and celebrating the passing of another year. For many people, though, the holidays can also be stressful and hectic. It can be a time full of event planning, last minute shopping, and budgeting of both time and money. In fact, research has shown that 44% of women and 31% of men actually experience an increase in stress during the holiday season. One factor that contributes to this increase is the anxiety that comes from trying to find that perfect holiday gift for someone. In order to help manage gift giving anxiety, we must first recognize and understand what it is and why we are feeling it.

What is gift giving anxiety?


Finding a gift for someone can be an enjoyable task. Sometimes it is anything but enjoyable. When we feel overwhelmed, stressed, and fatigued while thinking about holiday shopping, we are experiencing gift giving anxiety. There are many possible reasons behind this anxiety, the first being monetary factors. Between spending money on holiday dinners, saving for a vacation, and buying gifts for friends and family, the holidays can become very expensive very quickly. A recent study  shows that 45% of Americans feel pressured to spend more money than they are comfortable with during the holidays.

On top of this, we also want the gift that we select to be well received. Nobody enjoys spending time and money finding a gift for someone, only for that person to not appreciate it. Additionally, if the gift receiver is someone who means a lot to us, then we want to be able to show our appreciation through the gift. This leads to us putting extra pressure on ourselves to find the right gift. Having to find that perfect holiday gift, while also working within your financial limits, can become a stressful balancing act. This can lead to an increase in holiday stress and anxiety.

Read more: Surviving the Holidays With Less Stress

Recognizing your gift giving anxiety


If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed during the holiday season, it is important to pause and ask yourself why. Take a moment to check in and see if you notice yourself becoming more or less anxious when you think about gift giving. If thinking about it increases your stress and anxiety, see if you can identify what is behind that. Do you not have enough time in your schedule to get all of the gifts? Are you worried that you might spend too much money this season? Are you unsure if you can find the right gift to convey your true feelings to a loved one? Finding the true cause of your stress is the first step in managing gift giving anxiety.

Boundaries: the gift you can give yourself


If your main concern during the holiday season is spending too much time or money on gifts, it is important to set gift-giving boundaries for yourself. You can do this by:

1.  Setting a firm budget for yourself and sticking to it no matter what.
2.  Making a list of gift recipients and ranking this list from most to least important.
3.  Allocating a certain amount of money to certain gift recipients.
4.  Remembering that you are a busy person and making room to forgive yourself if you don’t get to everyone on your list.

Read more: Managing Holiday Expectations

What is the perfect holiday gift?


If you are anxious over whether or not you are picking the right gift for a loved one, it is important to first remember what the purpose of a gift really is. Some gifts may have a practical use but, most of the time, a gift is a symbolic gesture meant to convey a positive affectionate sentiment. When we give a gift to a loved one, it is really our way of telling that person that we appreciate and care about them.

It is important, then, to remember that the gift itself is often secondary to the feelings behind it. Our reasons for giving a gift are more important than what that gift actually is. Considering this, if you feel anxious over whether or not your gift shows how you feel, perhaps it would be a more meaningful gift if you simply tell that person how you feel. A card expressing your care for that person can be more moving than the gift itself. Or you could take that person out to dinner and tell them how you feel about them. Instead of being anxious over selecting the right material item, perhaps the perfect holiday gift is just letting that person know what they mean to you and how much you love and care for them.

How do you manage gift giving anxiety during the holidays? Join the conversation in the comments below.

Trevon Turner

6 comments

  1. I love this blog post! The holidays can be a lovely time of connection, but they can also be a time of pressure and stress. You do a great job of relating the act of gift giving to this conflict. For me, I try to let people close to me know that receiving gifts on specific holidays is not that important to me so that I also feel free to skip this part of the holiday season. Instead of linking gifts to holidays, I like to give gifts when I find something that really makes me think of the person at any point in the year!

  2. Amazing blog Trevon! Gift-giving anxiety is real and we might not even notice that finding the right gift is actually causing stress for us. I really like your point and tips on setting boundaries for buying gifts and I think it’s something that may not even cross our mind but can significantly change our experience during the holiday season.

  3. Trevon this is so great, thank you for sharing! As someone who enjoys buying gifts for others during the holidays, it can still be stressful. I love the idea of setting boundaries for yourself, especially if you tend to go overboard. It really is important to remember the sentiment behind the gift, rather than getting caught up in the price tag.

  4. This is a great topic, Trevon! Gift giving can add stress and anxiety to the holidays, which many people want to be a time of connection and relaxation. I like your idea of setting limits to how much you will spend on gifts. I also think hosting a holiday party or making time to get together with loved ones can be a great alternative to giving gifts!

  5. This is a great blog, Trevon! The holidays can be such a busy and stressful time, and gift giving anxiety can significantly contribute to the stress. I really appreciate how you encourage people to slow down and really be curious about what in particular is causing the anxiety about gift giving. I particularly like your idea about exploring what feelings you want your gift to convey to the recipient and finding creative (and potentially less expensive!) ways to express it. I know I deeply value it when someone takes the time to write me a meaningful card, even if that cost no money, and I try to do the same when I really care about someone.

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