5 Common Misconceptions About Bisexuality

Myth 1: You can’t identify as bisexual if you’ve never been in a same-sex relationship

Many people know they’re bisexual before they are ever in a relationship. It isn’t necessary to have a romantic experience with more than one gender before identifying as bisexual. While bisexual people who are in hetero-presenting relationships have the privilege of “passing,” feeling like we have to hide a part of our identity is a painful experience for anyone, no matter how we identify. Also, when a bi person gets married, their orientation does not change. 

Read more about bisexuality.

Myth 2: Men can’t be bisexual 

Due to lack of visibility, there is a stereotype that bisexual men are actually gay but too afraid to “fully” come out. While this may be the case in some instances when gay men are exploring their sexuality for the first time, bisexual men do exist. They’re just less likely to openly identify as bi due to the lack of acceptance from both heterosexuals and other LGBTQ+ folks. Bi-erasure, the tendency to treat bisexuals as though they don’t exist, is the reason why bi men are so underrepresented. 

Read more about gay shame.

Myth 3: Bi people are more likely to cheat on their partners 

This is probably the most common misconception about bisexuality that has been pushed for decades. Bisexuality doesn’t immediately answer the question of “who will this person be attracted to,” which may frustrate people used to making assumptions based on sexual orientation. This damaging myth may intersect with the alarmingly high rate that bi folks experience intimate partner violence. Making assumptions about a person’s moral character based on their sexuality perpetuates harmful messages that contribute to discrimination, abuse, and poor mental health outcomes. 

Myth 4: Bi people don’t experience any stigma, prejudice, or hardship because they can “pass” as straight. 

Bisexual folks struggle to be visible in both the straight and gay communities. They often encounter both the discrimination that gay men and lesbians face in addition to discrimination rooted in biphobia. Bisexual people experience depression, anxiety, suicide and other serious mental health problems at an unusually high rate. Bisexual stigma among health care providers and society may be a contributing factor.

Myth 5: Bi people are anti-trans 

Many bisexual people are strong allies to the trans community, seeing commonalities between the fluidity of sexual orientation and the fluidity of gender. Many bisexual people identify as trans, and many date trans folks. The word “bisexual” refers to people who are not mono-sexual. Some may choose to identify as pansexual, but how someone identifies is their own personal choice.